By: Spiice Member
Two for One

With the lack of "good" black men in most communities across the U.S.; too many
in jail, countless gay or DL, and a host of lost, confused, lazy and unfaithful black men.
Could a possible solution for sistahs be to agreeably share a "good" black man with a
girlfriend or acquaintance? It may sound far fetch, but I'm curious as to what you ladies
think. All thoughts are welcomed.



In cities like Atlanta,GA where the ratio of women to men is something close to 20 to 1.
I constantly find myself asking sistahs how do they cope in that type of environment.

The Ratio Factor-
A good friend of mine who shall remain nameless, said that she was giving up on men
all together in Atlanta, obviously because too many brothers in the A are not reaching
to the level of "man" she would like to take home to mama. She's a 30 year old gorgeous
executive, no kids, owns a home, good job, sophisticated, exercizes daily and listens
mostly to jazz and reggae, and like's to go out to more than the movies and applebees.
As she put's it, she has very little in common with a lot of the brothers she meets. She
says it's rare to meet a good man who she feels matches her flava and too many men in
ATL are out looking for one thing, sex.

All the good ones are taken-
So what's a girl to do? The well has been left dry and and all the "good" ones have been
snatched up. So many sistahs are left with, well, what's left! The dude who just got out of
jail trying to get his life together; the grown nicca still acting and dressing like he's 15 and
living with mama, aunti, uncle; the smoker who smokes all day all night, but can't take you
out to dinner; the questionable nicca looks like he hiding something, a wife- girlfriend - or on
the down low, or worse STD; the thug, sells drugs, needs to get bailed out once a week, no
job, and no car; the bachelor, mind blowing sex, but no real plans that involve YOU, and of
course the lame nicca can't dress, got no sex appeal, and acts like a dork. Take ya pick.

The Good man
I've heard my lady friends kick that "all men are dogs" mumbo jumbo since high school. And
in some ways they are right. But there are good men out there. And yes many of them are
snatched up; some are happily snatched up and others are just on lock down. It's understandable
that in a society where good women out number good men disproportionately, that cat fights are
bound to happen. Divorce, love triangles, cheaters, liars, deciet, haters, jealousy, etc., much of
this is a result of a lack of good, availble men. Women are even fighting to keep the bad men.

As black men increasingly loose the battle against the system, many are left confused by the
time they reach their thirties. And of course the good brothers who managed to beat the system
become a hot commodity. He's educated, he's ambitious, he's respectful, he has a career, he
own's things, and has plans for his future, and more than likely somebody's either got him on lock
or trying to get him locked down.

Two for one
With that in mind, being one of the "good" ones. At least I think so and I haven't had any complaints
yet. I did some deep soul searching to write this. Is it possible that the answer to this problem of not
having enough "good" black men be for sistahs to share a man. Yep i said it share a man. One man
two ladies (three if ya'll can handle it). I know what ya'll thinking, everyman's fantasy. Well from some
of the ladies that I've spoken too, it doesn't sound like a bad deal. As a matter of fact it's ideal for
everyone who can agree to it.

What's the plus side
First off, shake loose all that moral BS and the taboo thinking and broaden your perspective.

The Advantages

-Three very good friends
-There's always someone to hang with
-Awesome Sex
-Travel companions
-If someone has a child, some extra help
-Help with rent or mortgage
-Wonderful Sex
-A mediator during disagreements
-A spicing up a dulling relationship
-Potential Business partners
-Extra financial support
-Did I mention... great Sex
-and I'm sure you thought of something too

The Down side
-uh... I can't think of any
:)


On a more serious note.

With drugs, crime, disease, unemployment economic stress, and countless other demons
plaguing our communties. It's crazy to see so many sistahs raising children alone, single,
and not by choice but by circumstance, men often in need of "more" from their relationships,
couples struggling to stay together. It's easy to say that men need to get their acts together
and women need to keep looking "he's out there". And there is some truth to that, but I propose
the Two for One concept for those of you who are open minded, financially stable, sexually free,
and want to spice things up in your relationships.

Finally, What are your thoughts?

Posted by Spice Avenue at 4:50 PM